Being Kind—at a Funeral Home (#BestOf)

(the Best of) A Year of Being Kind, Friday, December 18, 2015

Christmas is “the most wonderful time of the year!” Except—when it isn’t. Reading over this post from last December, I am thinking of all of those who are feeling sad. Grieving. Feeling lonely. All the fears and anxieties and depressions and sadnesses, all getting in the way of the holiday holly-jolly. This is for anyone who is feeling that way, today. Or, in case you know someone who is not feeling happy and festive, today.

 

A Year of Being Kind blog – Thursday, December 18, 2014

Being Kind—at a Funeral Home

“It’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas—“ except when it’s not.

Yes, it’s just a week before the “big day.” Yes, I drove past a large shopping mall on the way home this afternoon (against my better judgment). I did not see a single empty parking place in the parking lot from my vantage point, driving by. Yes, the children at the preschool were excitedly talking about Christmas coming soon. “Is it tomorrow?” “Is it the next day?” And, I know the teachers patiently go through the calendar, counting the days until Christmas. “Next Thursday. We have a week until then.”

But it isn’t beginning to look much like Christmas for a good friend of mine, and their whole family. They have lost a dear, senior loved one earlier this week. This afternoon, and evening? The viewing. The wake. I went to the funeral home so I could be there for my friend.

So incongruous. Frenetic, anxiety-laden, rush-rush. Mad, frantic preparations for the holidays. (It doesn’t particularly matter whether the holidays people celebrate are Christmas, Hanukkah, the Winter Solstice, or Kwanzaa.) And then—to have a loved one die in the middle of all of that? As I said, so incongruous. It’s the holidays! There isn’t supposed to be any death, or sickness, or fighting, or negative emotions, or negativity of any kind. Not now.

But, life doesn’t work that way.

So, I took the sad opportunity to be kind to my friend. To offer my condolences on the passing of this sweet senior. To be with my friend for at least a little while.

I reflected, later on, that this is exactly why there is a Christmas. So we could have hope, in something much better and much greater than we could possibly imagine. Yes, it’s very sad to us, here. Yes, people are grieving, right now. And yes, people are rejoicing in new life, the life to come, with God.

I don’t want to say this too loudly, in case I step on the toes of someone who is grieving, sad and even angry right now. But—I look forward to a merry Christmas. Quietly, looking forward. Expectant. Quietly.

@chaplaineliza

Like what you read? Disagree? Share your thoughts with your loved ones and continue the conversation.

(Suggestion: visit me at my daily blog for 2015: matterofprayer: A Year of Everyday Prayers.   @chaplaineliza And read my sermons from Pastor, Preacher Pray-er – Thanks!)

Being Kind—at a Funeral Home

A Year of Being Kind blog – Thursday, December 18, 2014

Being Kind—at a Funeral Home

“It’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas—“ except when it’s not.

Yes, it’s just a week before the “big day.” Yes, I drove past a large shopping mall on the way home this afternoon (against my better judgment). I did not see a single empty parking place in the parking lot from my vantage point, driving by. Yes, the children at the preschool were excitedly talking about Christmas coming soon. “Is it tomorrow?” “Is it the next day?” And, I know the teachers patiently go through the calendar, counting the days until Christmas. “Next Thursday. We have a week until then.”

But it isn’t beginning to look much like Christmas for a good friend of mine, and their whole family. They have lost a dear, senior loved one earlier this week. This afternoon, and evening? The viewing. The wake. I went to the funeral home so I could be there for my friend.

So incongruous. Frenetic, anxiety-laden, rush-rush. Mad, frantic preparations for the holidays. (It doesn’t particularly matter whether the holidays people celebrate are Christmas, Hanukkah, the Winter Solstice, or Kwanzaa.) And then—to have a loved one die in the middle of all of that? As I said, so incongruous. It’s the holidays! There isn’t supposed to be any death, or sickness, or fighting, or negative emotions, or negativity of any kind. Not now.

But, life doesn’t work that way.

So, I took the sad opportunity to be kind to my friend. To offer my condolences on the passing of this sweet senior. To be with my friend for at least a little while.

I reflected, later on, that this is exactly why there is a Christmas. So we could have hope, in something much better and much greater than we could possibly imagine. Yes, it’s very sad to us, here. Yes, people are grieving, right now. And yes, people are rejoicing in new life, the life to come, with God.

I don’t want to say this too loudly, in case I step on the toes of someone who is grieving, sad and even angry right now. But—I look forward to a merry Christmas. Quietly, looking forward. Expectant. Quietly.

@chaplaineliza

Like what you read? Disagree? Share your thoughts with your loved ones and continue the conversation.

Diplomat for God (Feature Friday!)

A Year of Being Kind blog – Friday, May 23, 2014

Mahmoud Pasha Mosque, Cairo
(photo credit Matt Lepkowski-2005)

 

Diplomat for God (Feature Friday!)

My friend Dan? Great guy! My friend Dan? Generous, kind, ready to be of service. My friend Dan? Always ready to lend a hand or lend an ear.

And—my friend Dan? Associate Director of Presbyterian Frontier Fellowship for the Midwest United States. Pretty long title for a heckuva guy. He fills the shoes of that big title, to be sure. He started out studying to be in the diplomatic service in school. He was fascinated by this subject, for years. (Even as a child, he remembers.) But his life took a different turn, and he started his career in the business world. Until—God brought Dan to a realization: “similar to the apostle Matthew, in that, hearing the Good News, I got up from my agricultural trading desk . . . and decided to follow Jesus wherever He may lead me. The ride has been incredible ever since.”

Doing cross-cultural work immediately upon going to Costa Rica, Dan fell in love with mission work. Long story short, he attended seminary, became ordained in the Presbyterian Church (USA), and started working as an associate pastor in the Chicago suburbs. With a focus on mission in his life and ministry, he helped people from this area experience cross-cultural missions.

After accepting a position with Presbyterian Frontier Fellowship in 1996, he has since been focused on helping connect people. Connecting people from the Midwest area of the United States with small groups of believers and newly-planted churches—in frontier areas, all around the world. These are small groups looking for a connection! And Dan is a marvelous connector. A diplomat for God. On behalf of the Gospel, he introduces fellow believers in Christ from halfway around the world to each other. For support, for friendship, for fellowship.

One area where Dan finds open doors is in making bridges. For a number of years, he has been leading trips to Egypt (supporting the Presbytery of Egypt). He has grown, too, in his support for Christian communities within the Arabic-speaking world. But through this work in the Middle East, he also has been drawn to building bridges to Islam and to Muslims in the Chicago area. Dan says, “In fact, I have recently started an Islam study group for the northern suburbs of Chicago. . . . I care deeply that the Muslim world gain access to the Good News of Jesus Christ through these kinds of dialogues and relationships.”

What a reconciling work, what an opportunity for service. Overcoming fears, anxieties, and separation in a number of areas. Building bridges. Being a diplomat for God. Yes, that’s my friend Dan!

@chaplaineliza

Like what you read? Disagree? Share your thoughts with your loved ones and continue the conversation.