Showing Love and Kindness—On a Bus!

(the Best of) A Year of Being Kind, February 4, 2015

Sometimes a smile can do a world of good. It can lighten someone’s day. Just take a look at this conversation I had, a year ago.

A Year of Being Kind blog – Tuesday, February 4, 2014

City bus – credit Marin Dobson

Showing Love and Kindness—On a Bus!

I can get into the most intriguing conversations with people I meet, at a moment’s notice. My family rolls their (collective) eyes, sighs, and says, “Oh, Mom.” (Or simply sighs, in my husband’s case.)

I took the opportunity of a day off from work to go to the YMCA this morning, after bringing my son to school. I went into the women’s locker room to change into my workout clothes. Many of the same people were there, the usual denizens of the gym and the pool on a typical weekday morning. I took my time to change, relishing the extra time I had at my disposal.

A woman I had met a number of times before bustled up to a locker near me. We hadn’t seen each other for some days. After we said hello, she was reminded—internally—of the blog I’ve been writing. (Yes, this blog.) She turned to me as she changed and asked how the blog was going. “Fine!” I said, with a smile. She is involved with a non profit organization that assists women and children, and she wanted more information about the blog. So that some of the women could post suggestions about acts of kindness they are familiar with. I said that would be great, and thanked her so much! We talked a bit about how people could contact me. (Reminder: anyone can always contact me at the Facebook page A Year of Being Kind, or through my Twitter account @chaplaineliza, or through wordpress.com—just in case anyone was wondering.)

Another woman, a few lockers down, happened to be listening to us as we spoke about intentional acts of kindness and service. My friend went off to the gym upstairs as I began to talk to the second, older woman. She apologized for eavesdropping on my conversation, but I told her that was perfectly all right. Introduced myself, and the two of us immediately engaged in conversation, also! She told me about an act of service that instantly came to her mind, as soon as she heard about people being kind. “Giving people a smile. Just that simple action can help so much.”

I agreed, and told her about my smile (and I showed it to her, too—my smile just-sort-of happens, you understand). She smiled back, and we exchanged a few words about smiles. But then she went back to her story. She used to ride the bus here in our suburb to work. A bus driver on the route greeted everyone who got on his bus with a big smile, friendly and cheerful. As the woman told me about this driver, she obviously remembered him with fondness. A big smile came across her face. “I used to tell him that his bus ought to be called ‘the Happy Bus.’”

What a happy memory! And what a kind thing to do. A smile and a positive attitude may seem to be little things, but they can brighten a person’s day. They changed this woman’s day, this morning, just remembering. Thank God for small things—like smiles.

@chaplaineliza

(Suggestion: visit me at my daily blog for 2015: matterofprayer: A Year of Everyday Prayers. Thanks!)

Of Social Media and of Service. Of Kindness, Too!

A Year of Being Kind blog – Thursday, May t, 2014

Of Social Media and of Service. Of Kindness, Too!

Who here is a maven of social media? Knows social media—Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, Reddit, Tumblr, Pinterest, Google Plus—inside and out? Um. Ahem. Definitely NOT me.

Oh, yeah. Sure, after some repeated trials, I can put up some basic posts on Facebook and on Twitter. And of course, this blog you’re reading right now, on wordpress.com. And I do have a Tumblr account.

I remember when I set up the Tumblr account last fall—giggle! It was quite humorous to see my college-age daughter react as she sat across the living room from me. (She is often on Tumblr, Facebook, and Skype, scanning different sites and blogs and .gifs and other kinds of social media. She has dozens of contacts and friends not only all across the United States, but all around the world. She is a maven of social media if there ever was one.)

Well, she glanced up at me, at the computer table. Her eyes practically popped out of her head when she saw a Tumblr image on my screen. She even made some kind of puzzled, questioning noise! No words, for a change, from my literate, English-major-type daughter. I remember grinning at her. “Can’t I be on Tumblr, too?” She deadpanned right back, “No, you can’t, ever. Never, ever.”

I spent some time on Twitter today, more time than usual. I try to check in with my various accounts, most days. But today, I spent a bit more time, like I said. I happened to retweet several interesting, thought-provoking tweets. And, I followed a few links. Wouldn’t you know that I followed one link from the Director of a mission in London, England, read the post, and was so moved by something he said in the blog that I condensed it and sent it out as a tweet?

Here it is: Seen on the blogosphere, from @Windy_London: “We need to be “both and” Christians who obey the 2 GCs.” I so agree, Graham! Both/and! Amen.

My new Twitter friend Graham said, “We need to be ‘both and’ Christians.” In the post, Graham was talking about some fair-weather Christians who only carry out the part of the Great Commission were they ‘go and tell.’ Well, who wants that? It’s like people (parents, anyone?) who say to their teenagers “Do as I say, not as I do!” These fair-weather Christians only talk the talk. But that’s not what Graham wants believers in Christ to do! We need to be Both/And. (Both/And is one of my favorite phrases! Really and truly!)

So, cut to the chase. Graham “favorited” my tweet, retweeted it (RT), and “followed” me. Yay, I have a new Twitter friend! And I tried to be of service to Graham—and Paul, and Tom, and Fran, and Joan, and Kevin. And I tried to be kind to others, on social media today.

@chaplaineliza

Like what you read? Disagree? Share your thoughts with your loved ones and continue the conversation.

Following Christ’s Example—Being of Service

A Year of Being Kind blog – Wednesday, April 16, 2014

Following Christ’s Example—Being of Service

As I sat in bible study today, the leader ended the study with a call to service. Serve as Jesus served. Not surprisingly, this blog was the first thing that popped into my head. Accordingly, I spoke up. “I have a blog where I write about acts of intentional service. God gave me this idea at the beginning of this year, and I have been looking for opportunities to be kind every day.”

The other people around the table nodded, and seemed interested, but we were just finishing up. I did not want to get started on another conversation. So after some prayer, we left for the morning. But this idea kept rolling around my head. This call to service—because our Lord Jesus served others—is a tremendous reason to be kind, intentionally.

I thought I would go back and look at what I intended as I started, in January. Yes, I thought I would focus on acts of service during each week. And I am intentionally pursuing acts of service for each day. That’s every day this year. At least, that’s what I am trying to do.

What did I do today, you ask? I used my listening skills. I actively listened to a friend, and talked with this friend for some time. I hope I provided some encouragement and assistance. I know I was encouraged, for sure!

Our Lord Jesus provided encouragement and assistance regularly to people. According to the biblical record, He was never in a hurry, rarely upset, always calm and collected. Lord, that is what I want to try to do. Please, God, help me in this endeavor. I want to serve as Jesus served. Thank You so much for hearing my prayer and doing what You can to respond! I know I am faulty, flawed, and sometimes angry or upset. But, God, You can make things right. You can make things beautiful. I pray that, please!

@chaplaineliza

Like what you read? Disagree? Share your thoughts with your loved ones and continue the conversation.

Showing Love—On a Bus?

A Year of Being Kind blog – Tuesday, February 4, 2014

City Bus – Marin Dobson

Showing Love—On a Bus?

I can get into the most intriguing conversations with people I meet, at a moment’s notice. My family rolls their (collective) eyes, sighs, and says, “Oh, Mom.” (Or simply sighs, in my husband’s case.)

I took the opportunity of a day off from work to go to the YMCA this morning, after bringing my son to school. I went into the women’s locker room to change into my workout clothes. Many of the same people were there, the usual denizens of the gym and the pool on a typical weekday morning. I took my time to change, relishing the extra time I had at my disposal.

A woman I had met a number of times before bustled up to a locker near me. We hadn’t seen each other for some days. After we said hello, she was reminded—internally—of the blog I’ve been writing. (Yes, this blog.) She turned to me as she changed and asked how the blog was going. “Fine!” I said, with a smile. She is involved with a non profit organization that assists women and children, and she wanted more information about the blog. So that some of the women could post suggestions about acts of kindness they are familiar with. I said that would be great, and thanked her so much! We talked a bit about how people could contact me. (Reminder: anyone can always contact me at the Facebook page A Year of Being Kind, or through my Twitter account @chaplaineliza, or through wordpress.com—just in case anyone was wondering.)

Another woman, a few lockers down, happened to be listening to us as we spoke about intentional acts of kindness and service. My friend went off to the gym upstairs as I began to talk to the second, older woman. She apologized for eavesdropping on my conversation, but I told her that was perfectly all right. Introduced myself, and the two of us immediately engaged in conversation, also! She told me about an act of service that instantly came to her mind, as soon as she heard about people being kind. “Giving people a smile. Just that simple action can help so much.”

I agreed, and told her about my smile (and I showed it to her, too—my smile just-sort-of happens, you understand). She smiled back, and we exchanged a few words about smiles. But then she went back to her story. She used to ride the bus here in our suburb to work. A bus driver on the route greeted everyone who got on his bus with a big smile, friendly and cheerful. As the woman told me about this driver, she obviously remembered him with fondness. A big smile came across her face. “I used to tell him that his bus ought to be called ‘the Happy Bus.’”

What a happy memory! And what a kind thing to do. A smile and a positive attitude may seem to be little things, but they can brighten a person’s day. They changed this woman’s day, this morning, just remembering. Thank God for small things—like smiles.

@chaplaineliza

Of Breakfast and Being Kind

A Year of Being Kind blog – Wednesday, January 15, 2014

water sunrise

Of Breakfast and Being Kind

I went to a business breakfast this morning. Genial, good conversation. I enjoyed myself a great deal, although I needed to leave a little early. There were ten of us there. Eight men, me, and one other woman. I knew several of the others. The rest were strangers I was glad to meet.

I had known the woman, an acquaintance of mine, for some years. We hadn’t had a chance to reconnect for some time. It was good to sit next to her at the breakfast. We talked about ourselves, our families, and generally caught up with one another. She confided in me, “It’s good to have another woman here to talk to.” It’s not that either of us is at all averse to being with a room full of men. Certainly not! I really enjoy being with the guys. My friend said she often did, too. But this particular morning, she was happy to hang out with and eat breakfast with a fellow woman.

Afterwards, this comment led me to think further. I didn’t purposely decide to be kind to my friend. It just sort of happened. I was the way I usually am, in interaction with people. I am an intuitive, feeling-sort of person. I am aware of (and sometimes absorb) the emotion and attitude of the people I’m around.  I found myself behaving in an open, friendly way at the relaxed breakfast. I engage with others much more easily in this kind of situation!

I was able to share a little about what I do as a chaplain, and as a caregiver. I come alongside of people. Often in traumatic, highly emotional times. I try to contain strong emotion, and be with people in their time of need. But sometimes I can be there for people in more low-key, genial times. Like this morning, having breakfast with my friend.

Thinking about the beginning of Ephesians 4:32 (our verse for the month!), “Be kind, tender-hearted.” This verse encourages all of us to be kind—that is, sweet, amiable, gentle in disposition. Certainly not hasty, short-tempered, or abrasive. Second, we’re also told to be tender-hearted. That means especially compassionate, even if this is not the default way of being for some people. I can be particularly challenged to be this sort of person at all times, to act this way with everyone I meet. (Even though my personal default way of being does tend towards this kind of behavior.)

When I purposed to do 365 days of service, and to write a corresponding blog for each day (thus, A Year of Being Kind), I tried to have as few expectations as possible. I suppose that was so I could wander my way through each day, encountering people and practicing kindness whenever and wherever God wanted. I am only two weeks into the year. Already, I am amazed at how God has chosen to bring kind, helpful things and acts of service my way, each day. God, I wonder what You are going to bring me for tomorrow? I can hardly wait!

@chaplaineliza

Internal Life? Or External Walk?

A Year of Being Kind blog post for Monday, December 30, 2013

Internal Life? Or External Walk?

            For the past few years, I’ve been concerning myself with—myself. I have been striving to maintain some kind of spiritual balance, working on my internal, spiritual component. I pray regularly (or at least, try to). I visit my therapist and spiritual director regularly, work out on a weekly basis at the local YMCA gym, and I even practiced relaxation and meditation in an intensive way for several months. In all of this, I have been working on the inner “me.”

I have also been intentional with my prayer life. Not only have I been praying on an increasingly regular basis, but I’ve also started a prayer chain and prayer blog, so we all can be encouraged in our personal prayer lives. This helps my inner relationship with God prosper, too.

            But, what about my relationship with others? How about my family? Friends? What about those at church, or at the gym? What about my co-workers, or strangers I meet on the street? Have I been as studious and diligent at developing my relationship with them?

            Yes, I am called by God to be in relationship with God—the vertical relationship.  But I am also called to be in community, as well—the horizontal relationship, one with another. One of my spiritual gifts is helping people. And by nature, I am kind and compassionate in my relations with others. It’s my relationship with others and with my local community (as well as their relationship with me) that I want to work on in 2014.

            That’s why 2014 is my year to be kind. To help. To be of service. Intentionally.